Just "Yes."

I think about my dreams, just from seven years ago...I wanted to go to the University of Hawai`i at Mano a and study Hawaiian (language) to teach it and make it more readily available for those wanting to preserve that part of their heritage, but my parents would not allow me (at 16 years of age) to be alone so far away [failed plan #1].  My interest in piano increased and I decided I'd like to pursue piano performance, thinking that it would be a cool way to do something "for God," but my ridiculous number of hours practicing (without proper stretching) gave me lateral epicondylitis which still plagues me today [failed plan #2].  Next it was the combination of my (then dreaded) science courses and working in the pharmacy that fed an unknown aptitude for science, so I pursued pharmacy prereq's for a while, but I decided that would be boring [failed plan #3].  I then focused more on the prereq's for med school, planning to get my degree and focus on research/biochem so that I could go to third world countries and develop immunizations for diseases that others don't see worthy of investing their time or efforts in.  I could not finish completing the prereq's for med school because the schools I deemed legit rejected me (being an out-of-state transfer student is harder than you may think) [failed plan #4].  So I decided to take my love of languages and explored linguistics for a while and signed up for a trip to PNG to see what Bible translation was like, because, well, that's how linguistics is best used.  It was while I was in PNG that it was confirmed to me that linguistics wasn't it either [failed plan #5].  In ways that only God could, He brought my heart back to what gripped me when I was just 5 years old: adoption.  I came home to begin courses with LUO to just finish a Bachelor's in something so I could go on to get an MSW somewhere.

I was not ever excited about psychology, but I had already taken enough classes as electives previously that it would save me the most time in finishing.  I thought that I would finish just a year after beginning classes (December 2011), but realized that I would be wearing myself out with the coursework necessary.  I then thought, "Well, I guess graduating in May 2012 won't be all that bad if I get to keep my sanity" [failed plan #6].  Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha.  I keep making all these plans and I fail.  I make more plans and fail....like seven times over already! I'm an IDIOT!!! Yeah, okay, God.  I get it.  Really, I think I do this time.

I don't know what God wants to do with me.  I know that the passion He instilled in me for rescuing hurting and orphaned children is a big part of the plan.  I'm not sure what His timing is, but I think for once I'm just gonna stop trying to figure out what it is He wants to do with me.  I will simply enjoy Him and the mystery of His plans.    :o]

Proverbs 16, verse 9 is fitting here: "We can make our plans, but the LORD determines our steps."

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